Month: November 2019

#107: Grounded (TNG #25)

This week, the Enterprise gets totaled, and worst of all, they can’t even sell it for scrap. But Picard is determined to get it back in one piece, and it’ll take more than some hairy mud to stop him. Meanwhile, Data helps ease a socially awkward girl into the complexities of contact with the most frightening creature of all: men. What’s the benefit of being voluntarily overweight in the future? What does Riker really get out of playing the trombone? And is there any Earth sport Worf won’t treat like gladiatorial combat? All this and more in Grounded, the book that demonstrates the real reason for technobabble.

#106: Emissary (DS9 #1, episode novelization)

This week, Benjamin Sisko boards the galaxy’s most remote truck stop with his arms full of baggage, and I don’t mean Samsonite. He’s far from the station’s only disgruntled employee, however, and every one of them will have to turn those frowns upside-down if they hope to clean up after the previous Cardassian tenants. Sisko tells Picard to take this job and shove it, but the sudden appearance of a seemingly stable wormhole may render the question of a career in academia academic. Is Sisko the messiah the Bajorans have been searching for? Can a hew-mon and a Ferengi be friends? And how often do Vulcan names get recycled? All this and more in Emissary, the book that was made possible by a grant from the Jake Sisko Career Fund and by Viewers Like You.

#105: Shell Game (TOS #63)

This week, the Romulans decide to build their own Terok Nor—with blackjack, and hookers—but when they can’t stand the (lack of) heat, they find themselves forced out of the kitchen. When the Enterprise investigates the drifting station, they find themselves getting the same cold shoulder. Now they have to find the thing going bump in the night, and Scotty’s goofy ghost stories aren’t helping. Does Walter Koenig have dirt on the L.A. Graf ladies? What does a Romulan dildo look like? And whatever happened to sonic showers? All this and more in Shell Game, the book that will never know the joy of a Coney Island footlong.

#104: Nightshade (TNG #24)

This week, Picard is tapped to help bring an end to two hundred years of civil war on Oriana, and instead of enlisting his best people, he brings Worf and Deanna. But when Picard is accused of murder and the peace talks go south, the episode turns out to be a rerun. Meanwhile, Geordi helps a bunch of squares fix their engines and ends up tasting the rainbow. Can the Klingon and the Betazoid root out the culprit before Picard is executed? Can they convince the Orianians to accept GMOs? And are they maybe getting a little bit cocky? All this and more in Nightshade, the book that’s elementary, my dear Betan-Ka.

#103: Relics (TNG episode novelization)

This week, when the Enterprise investigates a ship that crashed on a Dyson sphere, they find a heck of a prize in an old cereal box. But before they have time to help him come to terms with outliving his usefulness, the sphere pulls the Enterprise in, and suddenly, they need his help to make it go from suck to blow. Meanwhile, some lower-decks action pads out the page count and takes some heat off of the senior staff. Will Scotty respond well to therapy? How badly would Picard flip out about food on the bridge? And how does Dr. Crusher really feel about Scotty? All this and more in Relics, the book that’s very proud of its en dashes.

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