Category: Movie and Episode Novelizations Page 1 of 2

#103: Relics (TNG episode novelization)

This week, when the Enterprise investigates a ship that crashed on a Dyson sphere, they find a heck of a prize in an old cereal box. But before they have time to help him come to terms with outliving his usefulness, the sphere pulls the Enterprise in, and suddenly, they need his help to make it go from suck to blow. Meanwhile, some lower-decks action pads out the page count and takes some heat off of the senior staff. Will Scotty respond well to therapy? How badly would Picard flip out about food on the bridge? And how does Dr. Crusher really feel about Scotty? All this and more in Relics, the book that’s very proud of its en dashes.

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#090: Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (TOS movie novelization)

This week, peace sells, but who’s buying? The Klingons, that’s who. Perpetual war, it turns out, is not economically sustainable, and they’re on the prowl for a better business model. But players on all sides have a vested interested in keeping things the way they are, and a road that was as smooth as CGI Klingon blood suddenly becomes very bumpy. If Kirk wants to make a history omelet, he’ll have to break a few prejudice eggs—but starting a fire in his new digs might be kind of difficult. Where did the Organians skip off to? Why is Valeris so emotional for a Vulcan? And to what extent can a novelization critique the movie it’s about? All this and more in Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, the book that actually cares about things that happened in Star Trek V!

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#088: Unification (TNG episode novelization)

This week, when Spock is caught gallavanting on Romulus, Picard and Data need some high-end cosplay and a Klingon Uber to drag the ambassador back to Federation space and his senses. But Spock may be on the precipice of mending the centuries-long rift between Romulans and Vulcans, and it’ll take more than some Federation finger-wagging for him to give up now. Is Riker over the trombone? What’s the boring new ensign hiding? And what kind of monster puts ketchup on their eggs? All this and more in Unification, the novelization of the two-part episode—now with 400 percent more horny subplots!

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#058: Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (TOS)

Yesterday marked the celebration of Thanksgiving in America, and what better way to commemorate the occasion than to review the Star Trek film that features an unexpected family reunion? Spock’s half-brother abruptly shows up, and already he’s asking to borrow the car. It’s kind of a hoopty, but he’s on a mission from God, or so he says. Sybok’s campaign of feeling everyone’s pain is getting a lot of votes, and Kirk has to find a way to secure his incumbency before Sybok makes it to the center of the galaxy and rolls out his popular God-meeting agenda. It’s the week where I learned to stop worrying and love everyone’s least favorite Star Trek film. Will my credibility ever recover? I’d have to have some first!

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#040: Encounter at Farpoint (TNG)

Ah, time to tuck in to yet another Star Trek adventure. I just love going on printed adventures with Kirk and Spock and all the rest. Just me and the NCC-1701, forever and ever. So what are they up to this week? Let’s see…

Wait a minute. “Next Generation”? Who’s this bald guy? And the one with the thing on his face? What’s up with the chalky pale guy? A Klingon in a Starfleet uniform? Bwaaaa? And since when do they let kids on the Enterprise?

Image result for who are you people gif

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