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#185: Rogue Saucer (TNG #39)

This week, when a malware attack softlocks the Enterprise bridge, Admiral Nechayev takes the opportunity to have them to test a new prototype saucer section. But when her new aide hijacks the experiment, the Prime Directive itself may be at stake. Who is the Architect? Who was the worst senior officer to babysit as a kid? And are canon-foreshadowing jokes ever not funny? All this and more in Rogue Saucer, or,¬†When Keepin’ Saucer Sep Real Goes Wrong.

#145: Antimatter (DS9 #8)

This week, when everyone’s favorite volatile starship fuel gets a day in the limelight, some Bajoran terrorists yank it off the stage. But when Sisko and Dax follow them through the wormhole to retrieve it, they have no idea just how bugged their hotel room is. Can the computer calculate your odds of scoring a hot date? Is there a Doctor on the station? And who’s been tapped to replace Sisko? All this and more in Antimatter, the book whose combadge location is better left undisclosed.

#136: Capture the Flag (TNG-YA #4)

This week, Geordi’s underdog dodgeball win may earn him an over-the-head wedgie. But when he shows a talent for Simon Says, he’s saddled with the responsibility of squeezing a tactical victory out of a band of ragtag misfits. Which races should appear more in Star Trek? Why would having a Vulcan on your team be a liability? And did everyone on the Enterprise talk to Boothby at some point? All this and more in Capture the Flag, the book that isn’t terribly interested in subtle villain names.

#100: War Drums (TNG #23)

This week, when a Federation colony asks the Enterprise to spray for wild Klingons, Picard disrespectfully declines, but sends Worf down to broker peace. Meanwhile, Ro Laren realizes she has more than just affirmative action to worry about when the bed bugs begin to bite. Will Worf persuade the wild Klingon children to pursue peace? Can Ro explain to the villagers why the wavy lines on the seismograph are bad before a sentient tsunami picks everyone’s bones clean? And who’s better at hide-and-seek: Data or Deanna Troi? All this and more in War Drums, the book that, unfortunately, features no dinosaur hunting.

#099: Sanctuary (TOS #61)

This week, a high-speed chase leads the Enterprise to a planet rumored to guarantee asylum with no credit check and no money down. But when Kirk takes the pursuit planetside, he quickly learns that ships that check in don’t check out. Now he, Spock, and Bones have to find a way out before they all get turned into Ken dolls. Meanwhile, back in the peanut gallery, Scotty trades interior design for intel and turns to the Bible for inspiration. Does this book have the worst foreword yet? Where are all the women? And can Scotty successfully endure an epic case of blue balls for the good of the Federation? All this and more in Sanctuary, the book that provides six steps to a better, more mindlessly obedient you.

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