This week, the Enterprise-D catering team delivers a few cases of Rice-a-Roni to a planet that needs to take a chill pill in more ways than one. While the planet’s ruler pushes his one-world agenda and plays around with his wood, a rebellious religious faction can’t agree on a playlist—some of them are trying to spin “Hot in Herre”, others want to bump “F___ Tha Police”—but they all think Riker might be just the DJ their movement needs. Will women ever stop finding Data so fascinating? Will Worf make the jazz combo? Can Picard decide whether they do or don’t negotiate with terrorists before the heat death of the universe? It’s the book with special guest stars Nick Offerman and Harry Chapin.